whoa I just made the coolest graphic right
based on this article on LIPTAUER (btw Liptauer is a Romanian cheese dip) I wrote in 6th grade:
It is awesome cheese; it will destroy you with its spicy flavors. You will be so tempted to take a bite, and when your little incompetent mind decides it cannot take the waiting anymore, you make the horrific, life-changing decision to take a fateful bite of the LIPTAUER! You are so blown away by its wrath that your feeble little body cannot take it and you explode. Your family must come and clean your guts off the walls with a mop.
The first step in this process is seeing the cheese. You will not know what it is at first, but you will approach it anyway. You breathe in the seemingly wondrous smells emitted by the LIPTAUER, and are flabbergasted. You are clueless on what to do next. After some more examining, you conclude that it is indeed, cheese.
This will arouse your senses, bringing all your attention to the cheese. Your mouth will start to water, your hands will sweat, you think will die of anxiety if you don’t eat that cheese! And yes, you would have, but you still die when you eat the cheese! So you have trapped yourself in a terrible situation; it can only end one way. And the worst part of it all, you are clueless about what is about to happen to you.
The next step: actually eating the cheese. You gather all your guts and you stick your fist into the bowl of cheese. The soft yet fiery texture of the dip causes excruciating pain all around your arm, but the sheer force of your persevering body make you grab a chunk and hold it close to your face. Just a whiff of that cheese could suffocate a man, but you hold out, after all you’ve been through.
You stuff it into your mouth before you can think about the consequences. You wonder to yourself what will happen, but it is already too late. Your whole body is on fire, and you feel it’s savory vengeance feasting on your soul. You scream for help, but you realize that nobody can hear you. You are in a different universe, and you can feel the cheese burning a hole in your psyche.
You go crazy and rampage everything in your path. You run and run, but it gets you nowhere. You can’t even think about where you are, but then, you blink, and you are back in the room, the room you first laid eyes on the cheese in. Your family is watching you, like you are a freak.
The intense, burning sensation inside of you grows and before you know it, there are your guts, on the nice rug, the chandelier, the painted walls. You can’t even feel bad about dirtying the rug, because you are dead. And a ghost.